Oh hello and welcome to final inSTALLment (see what I did there?) of the public restrooms series.
My last thought doesn’t necessarily involve the toilet or using the restroom, but rather using toilet paper incorrectly.
Are you thinking: How does one use toilet paper incorrectly? Is that possible?
YES. It is. Six words: Using toilet paper as tissue.
That is so so gross to me.* Why? Oh, I don’t know because toilet paper is meant for your BUM?! You don’t see me using paper towels as tissue paper. I’m not using tissues as toilet paper–although that would be gross because tissues are very thin.
It is not a two way street.
Now, I understand that sometimes you are desperate to blow your nose, but I cannot physically use toilet paper to blow my nose. If I am caught without a tissue, I embrace the drainage and let it drip on my sleeve before I use toilet paper. Cute, right? I’m taken…sorry, boys.
Anyone who uses toilet paper as tissue, please prove me wrong. Please prove to me that it never crosses your mind that you’re using butt paper on your face. I’ll know you’re lying but I want to see you try not convince me otherwise.
Now I have to stop thinking about this or I am going to gag.**
-EG
*Gross enough that I had to underline my second “so”
**Have you caught onto my melodramatic-ness?